Silencing My Inner Skeptic

I am a skeptic, I am a doubter and for some unthinkable reason I have the biggest friggin' dreams in the world for my life. I want to see the world, I want to write for Saturday Night Live, I want write for an Emmy award winning television show, I want to live on a floating home like the one in Sleepless In Seattle and want to find and marry my best friend like in When Harry Met Sally. I want to have it freaking all! But how? How can an overweight, unemployed 28 year old spinster living at home with her parents bare to think that any of that is possible for herself?
In the past 3 years I had trained myself to always expect the worst... in people, situations and life. I was never let down and I was never that positive; I just lived my life on the safe and easy even-keel of life. I walked away from my dreaming all those dreams. Until that day when I looked in the mirror and didn't recognize myself.
So, now I am taking care of myself again and I am finding something I have been hiding from for so long; hope. And hope leads to dusting off those old dreams that are still there shining in front of me, daring me to try again. And now I so badly want to expect the best in everything, in all of it. But I am fighting off that old skeptic in my head and when there are bumps in my road, that is when she screams at me the loudest to come back to the even-keel. I need to remember that was not living I was doing on the even-keel, that was me hiding. I was hiding who I am because what I dreamt for my life, that is who I am.
Obstacles will be thrown my way but I have to keep charging a head and be true to myself. Silencing my inner skeptic is going to be a struggle but I have to do it. I am fighting for the life I want here and that is important, that matters.